Text 194
pahilehi rāga nayana-bhaṅge bhela
anudina bāḍhala, avadhi nā gela
nā so ramaṇa, nā hāma ramaṇī
duṅhu-mana manobhava peṣala jāni’
e sakhi, se-saba prema-kāhinī
kānu-ṭhāme kahabi vichurala jāni’
nā khoṅjaluṅ dūtī, nā khoṅjaluṅ ān
duṅhukeri milane madhya ta pāṅca-bāṇa
ab sohi virāga, tuṅhu bheli dūtī
su-purukha-premaki aichana rīti
pahilehi — in the beginning; rāga — attraction; nayana-bhaṅge — by activities of the eyes; bhela — there was; anu-dina — gradually, day after day; bāḍhala — increased; avadhi — limit; nā — not; gela — reached; nā — not; so — He; ramaṇa — the enjoyer; nā — not; hāma — I; ramaṇī — the enjoyed; duṅhu-mana — both the minds; manaḥ-bhava — the mental situation; peṣala — pressed together; jāni’ — knowing; e — this; sakhi — My dear friend; se-saba — all those; prema-kāhinī — affairs of love; kānu-ṭhāme — before Kṛṣṇa; kahabi — you will say; vichurala — He has forgotten; jāni’ — knowing; nā — not; khoṅjaluṅ — searched out; dūtī — a messenger; nā — not; khoṅjaluṅ — searched out; ān — anyone else; duṅhukeri — of both of Us; milane — by the meeting; madhya — in the middle; ta — indeed; pāṅca-bāṇa — five arrows of Cupid; ab — now; sohi — that; virāga — separation; tuṅhu — you; bheli — became; dūtī — the messenger; su-purukha — of a beautiful person; premaki — of loving affairs; aichana — such; rīti — the consequence.
“ ‘Alas, before We met there was an initial attachment between Us brought about by an exchange of glances. In this way attachment evolved. That attachment has gradually grown, and there is no limit to it. Now that attachment has become a natural sequence between Ourselves. It is not that it is due to Kṛṣṇa, the enjoyer, nor is it due to Me, for I am the enjoyed. It is not like that. This attachment was made possible by mutual meeting. This mutual exchange of attraction is known as manobhava, or Cupid. Kṛṣṇa’s mind and My mind have merged together. Now, during this time of separation, it is very difficult to explain these loving affairs. My dear friend, though Kṛṣṇa might have forgotten all these things, you can understand and bring this message to Him. But during Our first meeting there was no messenger between Us, nor did I request anyone to see Him. Indeed, Cupid’s five arrows were Our via media. Now, during this separation, that attraction has increased to another ecstatic state. My dear friend, please act as a messenger on My behalf, because if one is in love with a beautiful person, this is the consequence.’
These verses were originally composed and sung by Rāmānanda Rāya himself. Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura suggests that during the time of conjugal enjoyment, the attachment might be compared to Cupid himself. However, during the period of separation, Cupid becomes a messenger of highly elevated love. This is called prema-vilāsa-vivarta. When there is separation, conjugal enjoyment itself acts like a messenger, and that messenger was addressed by Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī as a friend. The essence of this transaction is that transcendental loving affairs are as relishable during separation as during conjugal enjoyment. When Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī was fully absorbed in love of Kṛṣṇa, She mistook a black tamāla tree for Kṛṣṇa and embraced it. Such a mistake is called prema-vilāsa-vivarta.